Dealing with Disappointment

Disappointment occurs when reality doesn’t meet expectations.  Perhaps a family member, friend, or colleague did not behave the way they were expected.  Maybe money did not arrive when it was supposed to.  Perhaps you didn’t get the promotion that you went after.  Maybe your team fell short of a performance goal.  Perhaps your marketing campaign did not generate new customers.  The list could go on and on.  Disappointments can happen anytime and they can happen often.  How do you deal with disappointment so that you do not become discouraged or give up?  Here are a few ways you can deal with the disappointment in your life:

1. Evaluate your expectations.  Were your expectations reasonably optimistic?  We can set ourselves up by setting unrealistic expectations.  For example, expecting a client to pay an invoice immediately upon receipt when the terms are Net 30 can set you up for disappointment.
2. Communicate your disappointment.  When people disappoint us, they do not always realize that they have failed to meet our expectations.  Share your feelings of disappointment and commit to communicating your expectations more clearly in the future.
3. Focus on what you can control.  Let go of what you don’t control.  For example, an impending storm that causes an important meeting to be cancelled is beyond anyone’s control.  Acknowledge that there was nothing that anyone could have done that would have changed the outcome of the situation. 
4. Look for the positive.  Even in the midst of disappointment, there are often bright spots that can be identified.  Focus on what is going right rather than what went wrong.
5. Grow.  Is there something that you could have done that would have resulted in a more positive outcome?  For example, did you get looked over for the promotion because you were lacking in certain skills?  Improving our skills and striving to grow can improve performance in the future.  

Disappointment is a part of life.  How we handle disappointment when it happens to us determines our success and happiness.