Everyone has likely experienced disappointment in their lives at one time or another. As a child, a parent might have caused disappointment by not taking an outing to the park after they promised they would. A significant other might have caused disappointment by breaking a promise. A friend might have caused disappointment by not showing up to a special event. No one likes how it feels to be disappointed and no leader would want to cause a team member or client to feel disappointment either.
Disappointment occurs when reality does not meet expectations. Disappointment in the professional setting is usually caused by performance that is lower than expected, breaches of contract, missed deadlines, or a lack of satisfaction overall. It can lead to low team morale, employee attrition, loss of revenue, and loss of clients. How can a leader minimize or even eliminate disappointment among their team and their clients? Here are a few strategies for avoiding disappointment:

1. Set goals collaboratively. Whether working with a team member or client, collaborate to establish goals to ensure that they are reasonable and are directly related to expected outcomes.  When goals are agreed upon, meeting those stated goals will ensure satisfaction.
2. Communicate clearly. Disappointment is almost guaranteed when expectations are unstated. It is difficult to meet expectations that no one knows exist! Communicate clearly and effectively with team members and clients to learn about their expectations.
3. Manage expectations. If a team member or client’s expectations are unreasonable, be upfront about it. Impossible compensation expectations, timelines, or work products lead directly to disappointment. Be clear about what is possible and what is not in the beginning.
4. Under promise and over deliver. It is much better to provide more than what was expected than to have to apologize for not being able to deliver what was promised. Be mindful not to be overly optimistic when establishing timelines, financial estimates, and more. It is better to deliver early or offer cash back or a bonus later than to admit that overly ambitious promises cannot be kept.
5. Put it in writing. Protect the interests of all by documenting expectations or agreements in writing. This can be in the form of informal notes for an internal meeting or formal documentation with a client, such as a contract or statement of work. These documents can serve as a reference to manage expectations and to verify that the outcome meets the expectations and goals that were originally agreed upon.
6. Keep your word. Self-discipline has been described as keeping your word after the mood in which the commitment was made has passed. Excitement and motivation may wane, but it is important to maintain zeal and urgency to deliver on what was promised. Team members and clients value a leader that does what they say they will do, especially without constant reminders or prodding.

To be clear, disappointment happens, even with the best strategies and intentions. However, leaders have significant control over managing disappointment with their team members and clients. Avoiding disappointment improves work culture, creates positive internal and external reputations for the leader and the team, and leads to greater employee satisfaction and company revenue.
If you are dealing with disappointment as a leader, check out this blog post here.

Disappointment occurs when reality doesn’t meet expectations.  Perhaps a family member, friend, or colleague did not behave the way they were expected.  Maybe money did not arrive when it was supposed to.  Perhaps you didn’t get the promotion that you went after.  Maybe your team fell short of a performance goal.  Perhaps your marketing campaign did not generate new customers.  The list could go on and on.  Disappointments can happen anytime and they can happen often.  How do you deal with disappointment so that you do not become discouraged or give up?  Here are a few ways you can deal with the disappointment in your life:

1. Evaluate your expectations.  Were your expectations reasonably optimistic?  We can set ourselves up by setting unrealistic expectations.  For example, expecting a client to pay an invoice immediately upon receipt when the terms are Net 30 can set you up for disappointment.
2. Communicate your disappointment.  When people disappoint us, they do not always realize that they have failed to meet our expectations.  Share your feelings of disappointment and commit to communicating your expectations more clearly in the future.
3. Focus on what you can control.  Let go of what you don’t control.  For example, an impending storm that causes an important meeting to be cancelled is beyond anyone’s control.  Acknowledge that there was nothing that anyone could have done that would have changed the outcome of the situation. 
4. Look for the positive.  Even in the midst of disappointment, there are often bright spots that can be identified.  Focus on what is going right rather than what went wrong.
5. Grow.  Is there something that you could have done that would have resulted in a more positive outcome?  For example, did you get looked over for the promotion because you were lacking in certain skills?  Improving our skills and striving to grow can improve performance in the future.  

Disappointment is a part of life.  How we handle disappointment when it happens to us determines our success and happiness.

Leadership is a complex job description.  There are varying definitions for leadership in research, yet every so often, leaders come along that defy the current definitions and add more dynamics to the accepted notions of leadership.  Leaders find themselves defined by their success or failures.  Success can bring life-long accolades while failures can end careers.  There are many perspectives about what makes a good leader and a general idea about what makes a bad leader. Fortunately for bad leaders, there are strategies that they can use to become better leaders.

Characteristics of a Good Leader

In order to know what makes a good leader, it is helpful to understand what the leadership job description is.   While many job descriptions refer to leadership abilities or leadership qualities, those are rarely defined.  Mike Myatt defines leadership as:

The professed desire and commitment to serve others by subordinating personal interests to the needs of those being led through effectively demonstrating the character, experience, humility, wisdom and discernment necessary to create the trust [&] influence to cause the right things, to happen for the right reasons, at the right times (2012).

In light of that definition, Myatt also goes on to state, “there is no perfect leader; only the right leader for a given situation (2012).  However, most researchers and writers agree on similar qualities that good leaders possess. 

• Good leaders are courageous.  They confront reality, actively seek feedback, and have the difficult conversations.  They encourage push back, take action, and lead change. 
• Good leaders communicate openly and frequently, do not hesitate to make decisions, freely give credit to others and hold people accountable. 
• Good leaders understand the importance of organization culture, building and maintaining relationships, and effective communication. Effective communication includes communicating expectations and asking questions. 
• Good leaders mold an organizational culture to make people feel safe to speak up and generate positive energy.  Relationships are solidified by continuous feedback and recognition for performance.  
• Good leaders know the difference between managing and leading.  Managers have employees, react to change, have all the good ideas, direct groups, try to be heroes, take credit, and exercise power over people.  Leaders win followers, create change, implement good ideas, persuade others, create teams, make heroes of everyone around them, take responsibility, and develop power within people.

Characteristics of a Bad Leader
       
Just as there are good leaders, conversely, there are bad ones.  Bad leaders are leaders who have failed or leaders who have succeeded but their methods were questionable.  Failure is viewed in a variety of ways depending on the various industries, organizations, and results; however, there have been many prominent leadership failures over time.  Most failed leaders have characteristics in common.  These characteristics include feeling invincible, being paralyzed by fear, failing to grow, not being passionate, failing to dream, feeling entitled, and having a sense of victimization.  On the other hand, other leaders have failed by gaining success at the expense of others.  These leaders may have done things that are illegal, made decisions that were unethical, utilized unsound methodology, or settled for strategies that were not innovative.

How to Become a Better Leader
           
There is hope for leaders who do not start off great.  Fortunately, there are strategies that they can implement to improve their performance as leaders.  This includes:

• improving communication effectiveness
• sharing expertise 
• encouraging others to do more and to be better
• developing a broader perspective for their organization
• setting an example for employees or followers
• championing their team’s new ideas
• recognizing when change is needed
• improving their ability to inspire and motivate others
• encouraging cooperation among team members 
• demonstrating humility and willingness to change or adapt

Leaders should build on the success of one change to propel into the next one and allow space and opportunity for good things to happen.  Leaders who are growing must understanding that good leadership is often about the intangibles in the leader’s personality which can diminish the effects of a perceived failure.  For example, Ernest Shackleton, an explorer, had an apparent failure when his ship sank during an expedition to the Antarctic.  However, his failure turned to success because he was able to get each of his men home safely after surviving in the Antarctic for two years.  Crewmembers cite Shackleton’s leadership as the reason they were able to survive.  Despite failure, leaders have the ability to get better and to experience success.      

Would you like to improve your leadership skills?  Schedule a free consultation today!

​It happens to the best of us.  You set a goal and fail to meet it.  Maybe it’s a sales goal.  Maybe it’s a performance goal.  Maybe it’s winning a Super Bowl.  Whatever the circumstance, falling short of a goal can be devastating and if you don’t know how to bounce back and help your team bounce back from defeat, it could have disastrous results.  Here are a few helpful steps for recovering from a loss:

1. Process your emotions.  It is likely that you feel a variety of emotions after falling short, including feeling like a failure, feeling inadequate, feeling angry, and wanting to give up. This is a natural part of the process.  It is important for you and your team members to have an opportunity to acknowledge and validate these feelings.
2. Identify what went wrong.  In most circumstances, the moment when things began to fail can be pinpointed.  During this stage, it is important to identify the circumstances and hurdles that led to the defeat rather than pointing fingers at individual people.  Instead, consider whether you underestimated the challenges that you would face while pursuing this goal or overestimated your individual or team strengths.
3. Identify the weak links.  As the leader, you must identify any team members who played a large part in the team’s failure.  Is this person able to be coached or trained for better performance in the future?  If not, the person may not be able to remain on the team.
4. Find the bright spots.  It’s doubtful that the situation was a complete loss.  Were there any stellar performances?  Were there any small wins to celebrate?  Identify the individual and team strengths that can be leveraged moving forward.
5. Accept responsibility.  As a leader, success or failure falls on your shoulders. Was your personal performance less than satisfactory?  Could you have guided or supported your team in a better or different way? 
6. Adjust.  You and your team cannot spend too much time in failure analysis.  Adjust and redesign your strategies for next time.  It is important that you have a clear plan for how to move forward successfully.

No one wants to lose, but in the event that a loss occurs, we must be strategic in how we lead our teams to recovery.  Additionally, having a plan for bouncing back helps to prevent leading from emotions such as disappointment or anger.  Instead, a good leader will optimistically lead their team to their next challenge with a winning outlook.
 

Taking ownership is accepting responsibility for actions or behavior.  It's pretty easy to take ownership when something good happens--everyone wants credit for that.  The challenge comes when bad things happen.  Who's going to own up to that?

Taking ownership can be difficult when you or your team falls short.  It's hard to admit that you aren't perfect, you make mistakes, and you messed up this time.  Accepting responsibility for failure can be especially hard for over-achievers who define themselves by their success.  When you make a mistake, you may wonder What will others think when they find out that I failed?  Will I be defined by this mistake? 

In order to take ownership, you must admit your shortcomings.  When you shift the blame to someone else or make excuses for the failure, that is not taking ownership.  When you take ownership, you are saying, "I did this.  It's my fault.  I messed up."

Owning up to your failures may be difficult and uncomfortable, but it will prove to be beneficial in the long run.  Accepting responsibility for your actions saves time and energy for yourself and those around you.  Instead of pointing figures, investigating who or what caused the failure, and causing conflict among team members, time can be spent resolving the situation.  Taking ownership demonstrates your commitment to improvement.  When you take ownership, you are saying to your team, "I will learn from this so that I can do better in the future."  There is nothing to improve on if you are perfect, so admitting that you are not perfect and striving to become better at your job shows that you are growth-oriented.  People respect leaders who are down-to-earth enough to admit their mistakes and do better in the future.  Your peers and those you lead will respect your ownership of your mistakes.

We are human, so it's inevitable that we are going to fail at something.  It is how we respond to that failure that defines our character and strength as a leader.  Admitting that we have fallen short is the first step toward improvement and growth.  Teams will thrive when all members know that they are growing and improving together.